Happy 1st Birthday Murdock!

Yes, my sweet baby boy was born on St Patrick's Day. He is my little luck charm and not a day goes by that he doesn't teach me something. So on this happy happy day, I wish you all to indulge me while I publicly pen my thoughts to my Murdy Burd.

Dearest Little Murdock Henry-Vian,

I count you among my greatest blessings. You are the wonderfully sweet baby I have dreamed about and watching you grow and learn this past year has exceeded even my highest expectations.
I need you to know just how much I wanted you. Prayed to have you.

When I was entering the MTC, my good friend Amanda sent me this quote:
"Many young women are serving missions. Many are preparing to serve. Not because they aren't married or don't have anything else to do but because they have a desire and therefore are being called to the work. The reason so many are going is because in the next generation, Heavenly Father will be sending His Priesthood Army to the earth and wants to send them to mothers who have been taught in the gospel. What better training can a young woman have than that of serving a mission."-Pres. Gordon B. Hinkley
You are the reason I went on a mission. I knew then, that I would have a son.

Your happiness is contagious, you can make anyone smile.
I love your little giggle. It is changing now, no more a tiny baby laugh but a little boy chuckle, it makes my heart ache and sing at the same time. My favorite is the tickle laugh-it brings sunshine into the room.

I worry about you and for you.
Oh, how I worry!!! You have entered an ever increasing dangerous world and I don't want anything bad to ever happen to you. I know that I am just being a silly momma.I know that this wouldn't be life without ups and downs, without trials and disappointments. These are the things that make us grow.
I take peace in the fact that I placed you in Heaven's hands long ago and there you will stay.

I want you to know God. I want you to feel the peace that only comes from sincere prayer. I need you to seek Him on your own, so that it will be your relationship with Him, not mine. I will do everything I can to point you in the right direction. That's a promise!
I hope you hold on to the gospel the way you held on to the handle of Great Grandfather's chair. Always going back the minute you let go, holding on in the face of many temptations.
You are such a strong little soul.

I want you to be safe.
Please be careful with yourself. Be mindful of the inside as well as the out.

You make my whole day whenever you discover something new. You pay attention to the smallest detail, a crumb doesn't have a chance of escaping your notice. I love how you want to see how everything works.

I love the stories you tell. My but you can talk!!! I get a kick out of the way you can go from yelling at the top of your lungs to whispering.

My most favorite thing is when you let me snuggle you. Those moments are growing sparse these days as you want to be out and about, but sometimes you will humor me for a moment and even pat my cheek with your pudgy paddy or play with my hair.
I hope there will always be a small part of you that will humor me in that way. I hope you never out-grow hugs.

I do want you to be your own brilliant person regardless of what I say or tell you to do. Know that I will support you in your adventures. I will dream with you. I will kiss every skinned knee and supply ice cream for every broken heart.
I will even be content to sit back and just watch from the sidelines.

I love you Murdock.
May this be one of many many many happy birthdays!

All my heart,
Momma